A Real Mom Moment: The Attitude Switch

I have a 4 year old. Many times, she is a joy to be around. Her conversations and silly ideas have me smiling and laughing along with her baby-toothed giggle. Most of the time, I enjoy her curiosity about the world around her and random questions. Like last night while snugging into bed waiting for sleep to come, she said, “Mommy? When I’m a Mom will I drink coffee too?!” Her randomness brought a true laugh-out-loud moment. (And yes, sweet girl, you will drink coffee if you are tired as I am!). She teaches me about myself– in both good and bad ways.

Lately, its been a whole lot of the bad ways though. And honestly? Sometimes that joy I just wrote about is a struggle to see and feel. As I have yet another screaming match with my 4 year old mini-me over which tea pot she can use or how to treat her friends kindly (*ah hem* Share!)–I wonder where the Attitude Switch is and how to turn it off.  I envision the Attitude Switch to be like the common light switch: flipped up or down. Or, maybe even a dimmer light switch with different levels of attitude radiating through the room depending on the level of argument or if words of healing have been offered to dim the Attitude in the room.  It seems like lately though her Attitude Switch has been in the full strength On position throughout our day. Life would be a whole lot easier if we could talk a little more rationally and the wrinkled nose or beady eyes of a bad attitude weren’t seen on her face. She can go from innocent giggles to suddenly I am no fair and quite possibly the evil witch of the East Coast in a finger snap– there is no reasoning with her despite my explanations and good intentions. Her defense walls are up and arms are crossed, as are mine. No compromising, no negotiating.  Patience is no where to be found, it’s her way or the high way. Yes, fellow moms, she has even threatened to run away because I will not allow her to use my special tea pot or simply making her eat the dinner I put on her plate.  Oh-what a horrible Mom to provide a meal! Which was spaghetti, non-the-less! What kid doesn’t like spaghetti? (One that likes to battle, that’s who.) I look at my mini-me daughter in these moments and realize that she doesn’t just look like me physically with her brown hair that she insists has to be cut like mine and her big green eyes, but with her attitude, too. We’re both learning as grow. She’s been my daughter for 4.5 years, and I’ve been her Mom for 4.5 years. Right now, we’re learning how short our fuses are…and I hate that she picked that up from me.  I often forget I have an Attitude Switch too and need to turn my own off! After all…its only me I can truly control.

Sure, I am her Mom. Yes, she should obey.  But ultimately, only she can control her actions. I often find if I take a deep breathe and turn off my Attitude Switch–so does she.

Sometimes.

I also have found that usually I am the one who turned her Attitude Switch on with how I approach an issue. Perhaps if I responded to her with gentle words that I expect from her, the switch would get turned on less? I’m working on it. Like I said, she teaches me about my self and I certainly still have a lot to learn. It’s a good thing she so easily forgives my flaws, just as I do her.

How do you handle your daily battles? What has your child taught you about yourself– both good and bad? It’s good to know we Moms aren’t alone and all have real Mom moments!

Author Description

Faith

Faith, a native of the Charlotte area, is a Christian, wife and mother of 2 girls. She loves spending time with family and friends and loves to LAUGH!